Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Adoptive parents went from no children to six | St. Aemilian-Lakeside ...

When Ron and Carol Erickson became licensed as foster parents in 2002, it was with the understanding that the children would be returned to their birth families. Since then, when crises repeatedly arose, they have opened their homes, and their hearts, to six children. They ended up adopting all of them.

Half brothers Austin and Trey were their first two foster placements. Fully expecting them to eventually be reunified, it turned out there was no one else to take them. ?And we had fallen in love with them,? Carol said. ?They were our family and it would have been devastating to lose them?. We went from no children to two.?

Austin was 16 months old and weighed 15 pounds when the Ericksons got him. He has ADHD and struggles with learning and social connections. When they learned about trauma informed care, the Ericksons understood that many of Austin?s issues are from his past trauma. Carol sits with him and rubs his back to get to the lower brain, where his acting out behavior starts. And she reminds her other children to be patient with him because his past trauma affects his behavior.

The next children were siblings Katrina, Abigail and Gabriel, who were 3 and 2 years old, and 11 months, respectively, when they went to the Ericksons. Carol was contacted about a single girl for temporary placement at the same time she learned about the siblings. By then their boys were older and Carol was surprised when her husband agreed to take three small children.

?But we know how hard it is to place siblings? It was the best decision Ron and I made.?

After six months, the girls were placed for a time with their paternal grandparents. When a paternity test later showed they all had the same father, Gabriel joined them. The children suffered behavioral and health issues, and the separation from each other and Dad?s rejection of Gabriel were very difficult. It turned out the grandparents were not a good placement, and when Carol learned the grandmother wanted the children out immediately, ?Bring them today!? she told the caseworker.

It took about a year and a half to for the termination of parental rights (TPR) to occur, with the birth mother wanting them back for a time, and the birth father as well ? but only the girls. Visits were involved, but eventually the birth parents disappeared. The back and forth was very hard on the kids and the Ericksons, and the couple were ecstatic to finally be able to adopt all three in 2011.

When they heard the birth mother got pregnant again with a man she was not supposed to have contact with, the Ericksons stepped up again. When they were called about the last baby, Rogue, they didn?t hesitate. Then they learned she was born addicted to drugs and spent two and a half weeks in withdrawal. Carol was with her in the hospital as much as possible, bathing, feeding and bonding with the baby.

After awhile the birth mom disappeared again, and the birth dad said he wanted the baby. But there were sexual assault allegations pending against him. Finally the judge said the case had to go forward. He scheduled a TPR hearing, but the father died suddenly, and the Ericksons were able to adopt Rogue ? whom her siblings nicknamed ?Mouse.?

?You?re holding your breath until the final day,? Carol said. ?It was so joyous and peaceful when we finally learned she would be ours.

?Our lives were in limbo for so long, and now we can forward,? she said, adding the family plans to move to a farm.

?It?s very chaotic with six kids, but you can?t imagine your life without them. ? Now ALL the children know this is where they will be taken care of. They are all with their sisters and brothers, and they?re all in the same house.

?No more questions, no more visits, no one is going anywhere.?

Source: http://www.st-al.org/2013/02/04/adoptive-parents-went-from-no-children-to-six-2/

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